a few things // rambling

[nerdflighter]

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currently struggling w the fact that my writing is Okay and Readable but not Good or Unique and it just, idk, highkey sucks that my writing has no distinguishing flavor at all

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nothing seems to put a dent in my desire to write and sometimes i wish things did because then i would be more able to relate to other people + better rested but whatever i dont know

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lowkey spiralling because i posted a fic Today but i haven't gotten likes/comments and i don't know how to break my brain enough to stop thinking about this

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being sad is a full time activity

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i spoke to a friend today - one of two real life friends i retain during vacations. we're making tentative plans to go to dharamshala in the break year we're taking after twelfth grade.

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i am trying to read things that i really want to read but things keep slipping away from me and my mind feels like a broken door and i don't like it

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i think my cat has a fever

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i have german class tomorrow and a test i haven't studied for

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i want to die

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i wrote 1170 words today and it doesn't feel like enough

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on tumblr the fandom posts are interspersed with aesthetic posts. on twitter the fandom posts come between real life politics and tweets that my blacklist should've caught.

Comments

[hellofriendsiminthedark]

Writing just kind of gets better on its own and in the world of fandom, people are thrilled to read any writing, and all contributions are welcome to some audience. Also in time, your fic will circulate or people will stumble across it and that's how it'll find those people who will adore it and appreciate it and hold it dear. I think you're doing great and that you have a great mind, but it can be hard to internalize that, and that's understandable.

[amberite]

I feel like social media structures have become less fic-friendly in general recently, both in terms of how they behaviorally alter our attention spans and how they handle reader engagement.

One thing you might look into - my partner teaotter is a mod on fan_flashworks and it's a specific engagement-driving community? She speaks highly of it. This might be a good environment to engage with for fic purposes.